This morning I learned that my stay of execution had been moved forward from the weekend to today. Shit! I’d just crawled out of bed and now had to get my head straight, quickly get ready and get out of the house before my mother, my sisters and their bastard off-spring descend on the place like evil cackling vultures.
I was only woken up early because my dad can’t use a fucking door properly. He will not turn the handle and open the door like a normal person would, he will turn the handle and then slam his shoulder into the door making as much noise as he possibly can.
Apparently privacy is not a custom that Maltese people are aware of.
I received a message from the ‘Mad Greek Woman’, on my blog, again threatening to kick me. For somebody who does not like any form of violence she sure does threaten to inflict pain and damage upon my body quite a lot.
I found out, purely by chance, that Richard Herring was going to be doing a charity show last night so I thought I’d pop into Angel, have a couple of beers in the sunshine and then laugh myself horse.
I ended up staying in the pub as I did not really feel like sitting with other people. Good job as well because I thought the venue was in Angel, turns out it was more Highbury way. I don’t think I missed anything as a friend of mine also went and told me he did about ten minutes of old material.
As we all know today is the day that Jesus was murdered by the ancestors of people who now believe in him and worship him. And what better way for me to celebrate than by sitting in a Quinn’s in Camden, on my own, and getting absolutely hammered. I think it is what he would have wanted.
I am running the 2018 London Marathon to raise money for Livability UK in memory of my dad. If you can I'd appreciate any donation you can spare. http://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/deansaliba